Tuesday, October 2, 2012

I need title ideas for this book!

There I was, standing at the main staff, staring out at the sky blue ocean. I was

caught by it's beauty. I

 stood there for another moment, until I heard  Swabmop's voice coming from

starboard side, (That

tis' the right side of the ship, the left is called Port. I just don't want to confuse

you, mate) "You,

seadog up there, get your good-for-nothing carcass down here and I will give

you the rest of your

 orders then." I snatched a rope off of the sail and slid down until I could jump,

then I landed catlike

 on my toes, as I had seen the lookout, Sees, do many times. I am a cabin boy,

or girl, on a fine



 English ship called, The Knife. Though the name was rather chilling, she cuts

through the water

 as quickly as a knife slices bread. I am a girl,  though all of the shipmates,

except the captain, think I

 am a boy. Captain Smith took me in when I was quite young and nurtured me

until I now. I am a

 strong and tan lass, I am 10 and a 1/2 years old. because of my deep voice,

my short hair and dark,

 piercing eyes, I have been mistaken often for a boy. So when Captain Smith

was called to be on a

 voyage, he quickly thought up this plan to take me along. So now here I was.

As I was thinking

 about what good luck I had had for being with Captain Smith, Swabmop had

been talking to me.

As I came back to earth, I caught his last few words, "...and the Captain s

ays that if you don't do

 exactly as he says, he will throw you to the sharks." He spit out a long stream

of tobacco juice over

 the deck. I gulped, then smiled and moved slowly away from him. I would just

go to the captain myself and se was this all important job was. I lazily moved to

the captain's cabin doors and slipped inside. There was a corridor before his

room with both walls filled to the ceiling with columns of food. As I approached

the door, it

swung open and a short, bald and nervous looking man stepped

 out and looked around, just as I jumped back into the shadows. He

nodded nervously, as if to assure himself, mopped his forehead with a

hankie. He stepped back into the cabin,

closing the door behind him. I got closer and put my ear to the door,

and listened. 

8 comments:

  1. Awesome! I can't wait for more!!! :)

    OK, so what's going to happen?

    Name suggestions from what I've heard: The Knife, Traveling on the Knife, or something along those lines. :)

    Great job!!! I can't wait to hear more!!!!! =D

    ~Storyteller

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  2. Diary of the Knife sailor? I don't know, I will post more soon!

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    Replies
    1. Well, it depends on if you want to give it more of a chilling name. Usually you don't want your name to be TOO long, unless you're doing more of a funny story and then it seems to work out better that way. Otherwise, you'll want something short and sweet. "The Knife" kind of gives that chilling and immediately the thought pops into your mind--"Does somebody get murdered??" Something like that. :)

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  3. Very nice!!! I really like the way it starts. And come on, what's more exciting than a girl traveling as a cabin boy? Can't wait for more!
    Names? Hm, that's kinda hard when you've only seen a little part of it. But Storyteller had some good ones about The Knife. To make your title even more dramatic when your done, have the first word "the" be in normal print and then "knife" a lot bigger in a scary cursive looking print.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sounds great guys! Thanks for helping!

    `Otter Days

    ReplyDelete
  5. That's SUCH a great story! You're great at writing! If I think of any names, I'll be sure to comment and let ya know! Love your blog!

    Kisses,
    Isabelle <3

    ReplyDelete

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